How many people do you recognize?
Do you remember these bands?
Remember these days?
LAUGHTER IS THE BEST MEDICINE
I got myself a seniors' GPS. Not only does it tell me how to get to my destination,
it tells me why I wanted to go there.
They say every piece of chocolate eaten shortens your life by two minutes.
I've done the math. Seems I died in 1537.
I don't always go the extra mile, but when I do it's because I've missed my exit.
Nine Important Facts to Remember as We Grow Older
#9 Death is the number 1 killer in the world.
#8 Life is sexually transmitted.
#7 Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.
#6 Men have two motivations: hunger and hanky-panky, and they can't
tell them apart. If you see a gleam in his eyes, make him a sandwich.
#5 Teach a person to use the Internet and they won't bother you for weeks, months, maybe years.
#4 Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in the
hospital, dying of nothing.
#3 All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no
attention to criticism.
#2 In the 60's, people took LSD to make the world weird. Now the
world is weird, and people take Prozac to make it normal.
#1 Life is like a jar of jalapeno peppers. What you do today may be
a burning issue tomorrow.